Why The Bottom My Shoes Are Sticky

Last night I headed to our local Harkins Theater excited to catch the new movie, "DEVIL", but first I stopped by the snack bar to pick up a large bag of salty mouth watering buttered popcorn and a humungous bladder bustering Cherry Coke, then I rushed to grab my favorite seat, on the corner of the middle row. As the movie starts I began to dig into my popcorn stuffing large handfuls into my already stuffed mouth, and as the scenes grew more intense, my eyes locked immensely on to the screen, my body slouched further into my seat to the point where my eyes were barely visible from the seat in front of me, and I'd shoveled even more popcorn into my mouth until my cheeks looked 9 months pregnant about about to pop. Half way down the bag my lips begin to dry out. They began to sting and burn from all the salty popcorn I've just demolished, so I pick up my bucket of Cherry Coke which requires two hands to effectively hold, and gulp fiercely, racing to the bottom like a pirate digging above a buried treasure. Now that I had every under control, I could get back into the suspense of the movie. I start eating my popcorn again, but this time more wisely. I'd only grab a few at a time. I stretch me feet out and kick back.... Here we go! The movie is getting really good... Oh shit, the Cherry Coke kicks in and I have to extremely pee. I was rocking back in forth in my seat doing the pee dance until I couldn't take it any more, so I jumped out of my seat and burst out the theater door. I dodged people while I scrambled for the overhead restroom sign. I make it through the door and jolt to the first available stall I see..... AWWW I was in Heaven for 30.7 secs. I then dart back to my seat before I missed anything good. After the movie was over and the credits started scrolling, I felt it again... My bladder was full, so I made my journey back to the restroom before it got crowded and that's when I notice that I stepped into something sticky. That sucks! I probably stepped in some candy, but I thought, " Oh well I'll live" as I walked into the restroom. I headed straight to the same stall by this time I felt attached to it like it was mine. After I relieved myself again, I began to step off when I almost lost my left shoe. It was stuck to the sticky piss floor... FUCK! That's when I look to the right and left and notice every stall was exactly the same.

Yes, Ladies Its sad but true; mens restrooms are disgusting! That's the main reason I take my shoes off at my front door